I’ve got three projects, nearing completion. Days away they represent two things: the last of my ‘freelance’ projects where I’d take any work possible, and also a hefty sum of money. These projects have been in some version of nearly done forever. They have been an irritant and a distraction because all are–for various reasons–late. Speed matters, and the customers are–in all cases–at least partially responsible for the delays. I’m also partially responsible, and that sucks. I have good clients though that generally understand the way things are, and that they had a role in this stuff. I don’t feel like I’m exposed to a default risk.
But still–and I will joyfully honor my word–I would not have taken the projects had I known then what I know now. Stuff that can’t be delivered and done fast, open ended stuff….makes me into more of an employee than I have a stomach for. On the one hand, I have a commitment to honoring the people that are affording me to get out from under a pile of debt, that are supporting me financially. I have to honor the money they sent and earned. That means that I have to take a yoke and bear it. And that sucks.
When I deliver a product I created, I’m selling someone else. I’ve put them in my world, and I’m offering it to them. When I apply for a job, it is me trying to accommodate another. Oh, to be sure there is some give and take there, but fundamentally, there’s a difference between blog sales guy and freelancer. I’m still a freelancer, but I’m selling what I want, not what I can find. It’s easier, selling what I want, too because I can build a personal brand around it.
The revision hell that I’m in now is due to not having a finite ending to a project. It’s hard to take control after the fact…
The thing I’m working on today is a little project (incidentally lagging behind but not part of the above three projects) for International Tax LawyerPhil Hodgen that I thought would be done in March. He was in Dubai for much of that time. It should be done & revised tomorrow from my end, possibly today.
Then I’ve got to come up with a coherent, form based design interview that takes 5 minutes or less and allows people to express themselves.
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You’re cool. You know that. My project will get done and I’m not sweating. But I _do_ know the feeling you’re describing, because 100% of my world is the “open-ended” project work you describe. Self-imposed pressure is the worst.
What’s bad about stuff is that loads of stuff is done by fiat. I get a check. I do some work that resembles the promised work. I say I’m done and bill again. Spending time counting beans is something I detest, but the client wants everything in the initial quote done and all the other stuff done too.
A thesis blog is easy, it’s fast, and it’s done.
A project where I write, assemble edit, seo-ify an ebook is not.